Suddenly I was overwhelmed, the sensations in my face were almost unbearable, and every injury I had suffered from an almost fatal riding accident was agitated. I had suffered a facial blow from both front feet of a rearing horse, some 15 years earlier which separated the maxilla from the skull, broke my cheekbone, nose, jaw and top palette. 

I had been standing for some minutes in San Ti (Three Circle) posture. My teacher had already noticed and advised me to sit down and as soon as he could came and sat quietly beside me. 

Had I stopped my qigong training at this point I would have described it as an uncomfortable experience, and something I would not choose to repeat. I had not expected such discomfort, but continued with reassurances from Keith, that this would get better with time, and that these sensations would subside and evolve. That this had happened was a surprise to me, as I often worked as an artist’s model and was used to standing motionless for anything up to 3 hours of 25 minute periods. When modelling I could think through a project, a painting or book I might have on the go, or contemplate on something or someone in my line of vision, anything to pass the time. The concentration on me, my body, and the art of inward looking that qigong required was very different.

As with Tai Chi, as a beginner, I saw only the form; I wanted to learn the form. A teacher, such as Keith, from the onset teaches and speaks of all aspects that are an integral part of complete understanding. Although I could grasp the theory and listened intently to him, I did not always appreciate it, thinking things like: 
‘Yes, but I want to learn to do the form’.
‘Let’s get on with it; I really want to learn the form.’

As the form became clearer the outward movements and the names remembered, suddenly I was aware that all his other input had actually had an effect, the words and explanations had stuck and were meaning more and more to me.  As my physical ability and understanding advanced, I had a desire to look deeper, and to study more. I found that the form, in the superficial sense, was not enough anymore, it was just the beginning; I had barely caused the faintest ripple on the surface. 

This does not mean that I was not enjoying what I had already achieved; it simply means that like a good book, one wants to keep turning the pages.

This was the beginning of my Qigong training; those sensations did subside, and were replaced with new and interesting physical manifestations.

 I had been prepared by Keith but had not expected such powerful feelings, especially and surprisingly with the less dynamic forms.

With time and concentration, I was soon past the first feelings of discomfort and started to become aware of changes, movement and space inside my body. As I practised more I became aware of even more subtle consciousness.

I would experience what I can best describe as powerful creaking elastic bands in my limbs and joints. These were very strong, fascinating sensations and soon I was aware of looking inward, concentrating on my body and the more refined changes within it. At first as I learned to move my breath around my body, I experienced many changes, on one occasion to my amazement I found myself giggling, and much as I tried, I could not suppress it or do anything but enjoy it and let those around me enjoy it too. 

I was prepared to put the training in, to discover what results, time and practise would bring. I have never thought of this discipline in any way as oppressive, after all I wanted to enjoy my practise, and this could only be done by achieving the goals I had set myself.  Very soon my purposeful exercise became less externally imposed and became a source of inner strength and an enriching, natural part of my everyday life. 

The results and really tangible benefits were apparent from the beginning despite my initial discomfort, my energy increased, my work as an artist was more easily inspired and with time I have experienced an ability to cope calmly with those things that we are not in control of and act more efficiently with those things we are. This has increased with ongoing practise and is exciting, diverse and wondrous on a daily basis. Perhaps in some ways, beginning the Qigong journey was for me the most uncomfortable part, the time when I was most tempted to give up, I am forever glad that I did not give in to that temptation.  I am glad also that I had those experiences to draw on now when I observe similar discomfort, difficulties or doubt in my own students, to help them get past the temptation to give up...……    

Go well, Gloria

Gloria is available for Tai Chi and Qigong courses and workshops 

To contact her email; gloria@gloriadean.com

 

©Golden Rooster Institute of Chinese Internal arts. 2010 Penela, Portugal

 

My career as an artist has led me on many unexpected paths, amongst them, the restoration of valuable antique Chinoiserie furniture and works of art. Every day I would draw, apply, carve and gild tiny people who amongst their everyday activities were practising their art of Tai Chi. I portrayed their beautiful flowing movements and purposeful stances with delight and I often thought how wonderful it would be to learn. 

So sometime later galvanised by a brief, but fortuitous encounter with a student of Tai Chi, the little knowledge I had already acquired through my work and the fact that Tai Chi followed much of the philosophy that I already possessed in my life, I embarked on a new adventure in Tai Chi Chuan.

I wanted to find a master, a mentor. I was studying classical riding up to that time, at Lord and Lady Loch's  wonderful yard, and I desired the inspiration that I had found in my riding teacher, Lord Henry Loch, before he died so prematurely. http://www.sylvialoch.com/

I sought the advice of the Tai Chi Union of Great Britain and the BCCMA, and although not my preferred way of learning, I went to a local class. I liked and was impressed with the senior students and watched Keith perform with fluidity, focus and dynamism. This I thought could be the one I am looking for, how could I have found him so easily.

Despite this I was soon eager to be out of the full-time class situation. I wished for private lessons, a personal and concentrated learning experience to work alongside it.

My experience in horsemanship helped enormously with understanding the martial applications and the subtle control of the body. The graceful and devastatingly powerful movements performed in such places of excellence as the Spanish Riding School, are all derived from martial roots, and require the same attention to balance, smoothness, flexibility, responsiveness and elegance. I learnt from one of the most talented teachers I had ever met, he took me to an exalted level of achievement and understanding in the two and half years I rode with him before he died so prematurely.  So I knew this was possible for me to achieve again in another art.

I have never under estimated work and effort, but when this is borne out of desire to reach a peak level in whatever one pursues, it is achievable and gratifying.

 

Having taken time out from my classes, for personal reasons at that time, I continued to practise the modest standard of Tai Chi I had reached, every day with my young son. His ability to read, understand, retain information and his inexhaustible enthusiasm enabled us to work together under our own impetus. His interest was such that I took him to Keith, the man I believed to be the Master we sought. He was! This proved to be a rewarding, intense and ongoing experience for my son also.

As for me, some twelve years on, I am studying, living and teaching with my mentor in the art of Tai Chi Chuan.
I delight in the weapon forms, in particular the Tai Chi Sword form. This elegant and flowing form heightens my awareness and focus, with the sword ´moving like the calligrapher’s pen`. 

My work grows, it opens my mind and inspiration for my painting comes more easily. 

Art is an expression of the reaction of the spiritual self, to the encounters of everyday reality and sometimes more. In practicing my Tai Chi I get in touch with these emotions, experiencing them as physical manifestations which interfere with or sometimes improve my form. In seeking balance within I become more aware of my true self and it is this I attempt to express within my art, my teaching and my life.

                                     Gloria

To discover more about my work as an artist you can visit www.gloriadean.com 
  

©Golden Rooster Media Penela 2008